Category Archives: Relationships

The Death of a Parent, Part 2

Posted on March 17, 2014 by Bob Ritzema

In a recent post I described an article by novelist Mark Slouka on the effect that his father’s death had on him. I provided a few quotes from the article, each followed by my reflections. Here are some more quotes, … Continue reading →

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Meeting Our Parents, Again

Posted on November 25, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Jan Wilberg, blogging at Red’s Wrap, wrote a beautiful post recently in which she imagines traveling back in time and meeting her parents before they became her parents. She then performs a sort of time travel by reflecting on a … Continue reading →

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How Well Do You Grant Your Parents Independence?

Posted on September 21, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

I found an interesting observation by Harvard professor James Wood in his recent  New Yorker article on memoirs written by the children of several mid-twentieth century writers.  Wood notes, “To bestow on one’s parents their independence is also to announce … Continue reading →

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On Not Starting School

Posted on September 7, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

The school year has started, but not for me; I’m entering my second year of retirement from Methodist University.  Last fall, the transition from full-time employment was eased for me since I taught an online class.  This fall I’m not … Continue reading →

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Gray Divorce

Posted on September 3, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Relationships are as important in the second half of life as in the first half.  Unfortunately, relationships in mid- and late-life are not immune to struggle and even failure.  One recent phenomenon is an increase in divorces among middle aged … Continue reading →

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Why Do We Attend Reunions?

Posted on June 29, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Why do we attend class reunions?  Why revisit a time in our lives when we weren’t at our best and maybe were at our worst?  Are the people with whom we went to school really so important to us that … Continue reading →

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Who Are Our Grandchildren?

Posted on June 14, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Who are our grandchildren, these little people who barge into our lives and kick over the traces just as we’ve gotten settled, just as the pattern of our days has become staid and predictable? They are a blessing, of course.  No matter what we’ve done, no … Continue reading →

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Does It Matter If You Look Old?

Posted on May 28, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Our appearance changes as we age (just not much if you’re Dolly Parton).  Most of us past midlife know we look different, but haven’t entirely made our peace with our changing looks.  Some wrinkles are OK, a little graying, but … Continue reading →

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In case you’re wondering if you live on ….

Posted on May 13, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Originally posted on All those days that came and went …:
Dear Mom, In case you’re wondering how, or even if, you live on in our lives — I wanted to reassure you that the seeds you so carefully sowed all…

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The Reluctant Caregiver and Agape

Posted on March 30, 2013 by Bob Ritzema

Several weeks ago, Paula Span of the New Old Age blog wrote about “The Reluctant Caregiver.” She’s referring to someone who is providing care for someone in need of help but provides the care grudgingly rather than willingly.  She cites … Continue reading →

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